So Sick
by only-re
Summary: Shintaro was so down with wishing that Ayano's still there


… _and I know it makes no sense, but it's the only way I hear your voice anymore_…

Again, the boy in black hoodie tapped his i-Phone. A clear bright voice replied his call,

[Hello, this is Ayano. I'm not on the phone by now, feel free to leave a message]

Shintaro tapped again and the call was disconnected—only to tap redial once again.

"Master, please, enough already. She'll never come back to you no matter how many times you do this. I'm sure she'd rather see you moving forward than crying over yesterday!"

Shintaro turned his head. The twin-tailed blue haired girl on the screen looked concerned, but Shintaro was getting more annoyed than ever.

"You're saying that she's _**yesterday**_?"

"But master, you know well that she is, and she will never come back to life!"

"So you're telling me that I shouldn't have cling to her memories and just—simply—let her go?"

"Master, keeping her memories is fine, but wiping off your tomorrow because off her—"

"You're trying to blame it all on her?" now Shintaro was fired up. Who the hell is this annoying girl, pretending to call him master but in reality she's moving on her own will, criticizing him all the time. As if she knows.

"A neighbor like you won't understand. Get lost already."

… _it's been months, for some reason I just can't get over us_…

No. It's been two years actually. Two years since Ayano left him, and even longer since he met Ayano. And Shintaro was just so down with wishing that she's still there.

He could recall very clearly how he brushed off Ayano's hand that insignificant afternoon, not so long after he met her.

"Don't mind me, just be gone already!"

"No! I'll stay by you!"

"Jeez, cut it out already!" Shintaro could hear his own voice from back there, nearly yelling as he sulkily walked past Ayano. He knew, however, that she still, obediently, followed him from behind.

If only he knew that this was going to happen, he would've done anything to make Ayano happy. He should've persisted to make Ayano spilled out the truth. But who could've known? That day, when he saw her crying in an empty classroom, he was dumbfounded— being the least sociable person who never made any friends, he was unable to figure what he should do. And Ayano was always smiling so brightly, so he thought that it was only a trivial matter and she must've found the solution whatsoever.

Who could've told? If the genius who can solve any test with eyes closed and still gets 100% didn't even able to predict that, than no one can.

… _said I'm so sick of love song, so sad and slow …_

"Master, it's already past noon. How long are you going to work over that song you'll never going to finish?"

That concerned voice distracted Shintaro from his concentration.

Truth be told, she was downright correct. He could never finish this song. Even listening to this song, _his own song_, got him to crying all the time.

You got it right. It was a song about her—it was supposed to be. But no, he could never finish this song—let alone to listen to it.

_I don't need a song if she was here_, Shintaro thought in bitterness.

"Master…" the voice disrupted him from his thoughts. Shintaro stared blankly towards the screen—towards her.

"Shut up!"

"Master, please…" she pleaded, sounded worried as hell. "She wouldn't be happy if you sacrifice your future…"

"AS IF YOU KNEW HER!" Shintaro roared hurtfully.

"Stop talking about her as if you knew her! Don't talk like I shouldn't cherish her! Stop talking ABOUT ME!"

.

_... so why can't I turn off the radio?_

"I don't need you, I never do! It was you who came all the way to my computer, and kept on jabbering about my life ever since! You don't know her the least, you don't know me. Stop pretending to be concerned!"

Shintaro stretched his arms towards the PC, and, as if it was a dream, his hands got through the screen and into the PC.

He reached out for Ene's neck. It was slender, it didn't need much strength to break it, plus, Ene couldn't fight back. He was _real_, Ene was not. There's no way something that didn't even exist at the first place could break the reality.

The screen blackened out. Silence filled his senses. He crouched on the floor, screaming painfully and started to sob.

Someone was watching him. Or was it just his imagination playing tricks on him?

Whatever.

First stage is cleared, Shintaro thought to himself as realization came to his senses once again.

Now, to the next step.

Shintaro took a pair of scissors. It felt cold and so heavy on his palm.

It's got to be now.

… _but it's the only way I hear your voice anymore_…


End file.
